Showing posts with label satire. Show all posts
Showing posts with label satire. Show all posts

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Jammie Nicholas Surplus: Feces Scent to Drive Men WILD!

Just when you thought you'd seen it all in fragoland, a new ~euphemistically called?~ fragrance arrives that promises you what you had been dreaming of all your life I'm sure: smelling of feces and dirt! "Gee, your hair smells like shit!" Is there a line more delightfully received by a female from a male admirer? Careful what you say or you'll risk having your perfumista card revoked...
London-based artist and self-proclaimed perfumer Jammie Nicholas, who proclaims "The Sun is But One Anus" and "Curiosity Castrated the Cat", named this controversial fragrance Surplus, "made from the excesses of the body" perfectly suited to the concept which should have every dog out there sniffing wildy: "I didn’t want to be like all the other schmucks and translate something from English into French just to sound glamourous", says Jammie. "Surplus carries the same meaning in both languages, which negates the romantic connotations of the French language."

A loaded meaning indeed. Well, no one knows about the joys of dirt like the French who doused themselves in vats of perfume in centuries past to cover up the stink of bodies unwashed since their own christening, using pleasant smells to cover up non pleasant ones. So now, the tables have been reversed and unpleasant smells will (?) be put on some of the "edge" back on our super-clean bodies.
I can hear the perfumista cries in my head right now:

~"Have you heard about that new extra-limited exclusive scent called Surplus? It's supposed to have a dirty smell"

~"Dirty as in indolic, you mean?"

~"Hmmm, don't know about that but it's supposed to be fecal, rather beyond indolic. Hard core stuff."

~"Oh my, fecal! Gimme some! I want to embrace my and the artist's innnermost effluvium so badly! It reconnects me with my core center"

~"Fecal does that to you, doesn't it. I bet it will drive all the guys WILD! I hear it's extra limited distribution, only 85 copies in existence and then no more!"

~"Oh dear...LEMMING!!! Who sells it?"

~"Not sure. I have heard of a niche new retailer who call themselves "The Worshipful Society of Toilette Apothecaries", they're supposed to have a very exclusive art salon, located in a seedy banlieu in Paris...or is it London, I don't recall".

~"Goodness, how can anyone take advantage of such an opportunity, though, without a ticket to Paris or London?! Clearly I must befriend the artist on Facebook and ask him to reserve at least three bottles for me and another ten for my innermost circle of friends who can appreciate this art level."

~"It takes quite a bit indeed to appreciate this sort of stuff. It's not just for the hoi polloi, you know. You have to make yourself known for having your nose firmly up your butt, so to speak. Not be repelled by what mommy told you back then when you potty trained..Not being so very anally retentive when wiping after doing your business you know...."

~ (pensively) "Assuredly...yeah...Now lemme look..." (contemplates purchase and contacting Jammie on Facebook)


What inspired Jammie Nicholas for this coprophilially embracing project, apart from any potty training misadventures that is? A book by the late Dominique Laporte called History Of Shit. (while you're at it check out this and that too). In it, the social historian analyses the theoretics of feces, down to its social implications and the role the dirty smells play in the construction of cosmetics.

Thankfully Jammie Nicholas has his head on his shoulders at least some of the time and is charging economic prices for something that is meant to be a cuiro purchase anyway: Surplus is available as a limited edition 60 ml of Eau de Toilette in 85 copies priced $40.
The site is at surplusperfume.com. Bon voyage!

pic via fragrantica

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