La parfumeuse chauve: a play in 3 acts

ACT I
It is a bright morning in the kingdom of Denmark. Everyone is leafing through papers, checking out their favourite internet boards and blogs and chitchattering merrily on scented subjects.
The characters:
1.the bearer of fragrance news (an integral part)
2.the innocent perfumephiles
3.the lone voices of dissent
4.the “expert” –wearing a hyacinth crown foiled in antique gold
5.the bewildered: silent parts
6.the commentator: whispers in italics

-"Look, here is the new X and Y perfumes, just about to be launched !"
-"Oh, wow, I didn't hear about it! Thanks!!"
-"Wow, that sounds delish!"
-"You know I read about it on Z blog and it sounds like it's le dernier cri on steroids! It's bound to be wonderful, they really know what they're talking about!"
-“Oh yes, it must be wonderful!”
-"Oh, oh, not another lemming! Must get this right away"
{enthusiasm is palpable now}
-“Where is this available? I must order some!”
-“do you think if I go to T shop they will handle out samples? It’s so niche…I would probably brave it and order that 50$ sample on-line” {50$ for a sample???}

Intemission while the whole board goes to order samples/ get decants/buys unsniffed....

ACT II
-"Oh, it's fabulous! Trust me, it's exceptional, I never expected it to be so me! You must try it"
-"I am swoooooning......it's so dark....so sexy......so deep......" {deep as the abyss}
-“What have I been telling you? Isn’t it the most intriguing thing ever since that other niche thing we heard about about 10 nanoseconds before?”
-"You know……I am alittle shy in bringing this up, but I have just tried it and found some difficulty in "getting it" but I will keep trying. It's worth it, I'm sure"
-Collective encouragement of good natured people: "Yes, keep on trying!!" {About the rest of your physical life, for instance...}
-"Now, I have tried and tried and can't get it to make it work. It must be my chemistry! Darn chemistry!! (the character is virtually sobbing)"
-“Ah..chemistry can be a bitch. It’s so unpredictable” {astronomy on the other hand is not}
-"It's really not that great, come to think about it.....It reminds me of a couple of things I have tested or even owned"
-“Hmmmmm…I wasn’t that impressed either. Too much cunning advertising maybe?”

ACT III
Big “expert” interjecting:
-"Of course it takes some expertise and finer "gout" to appreciate such things. I really liked it and I stand behind my conviction!"
{while selling the bottle as fast as possible }
-"Well, Z, I'm sure you're right, I just have to accept that my chemistry isn't as refined as yours. Must be those genes"
{or possibly that mercenary spirit instilled during hard, rationed days}
-“Yes, alas, we can’t all be satisfied with those difficult things for the select few. I wonder if I can swap it or sell it…while it’s still hot…hmmmm…”


CURTAIN
End of story: the great new release is tentatively brought up again from time to time to be met with disparaging or confusing comments by a multitude of late-bloomers who happened upon it by chance.....

The above is not a play by Ionesco. But it very well could be.

Pic comes from BPAL site.